The real struggle of a First Post

The apprehension is real.

It’s been almost two whole months since I decided to start writing on Medium and a little more than five months since my last post.

I don’t know why writing my first post on a new medium ( medium, Medium. Get it? ) is more intimidating than the time I wrote my first ever blog post at 19.

Maybe I’m more aware of how I’ll be perceived and I care a lot more about that than I did two years ago. Maybe the kind of articles I’ve read on medium get like 2K or 5K claps (sometimes more) and such good authors, I envy and venerate seem like they’re swinging a wrecking ball through the wall that’s the reader’s mind while I’m trying to make a dent with a paper nail and a plastic hammer.

The stories on the homepage don’t help either. They say, you read the same lines differently when you’re a reader and when you’re a writer. They’re not wrong. So now when I read a brilliant article, I don’t just appreciate the storytelling, I also wonder if I’ll ever pull something like that off. It’s instinctive, it’s not like I want to juxtapose myself with every author I come across and admittedly decide that I will never amount to anything in life.

But. Baby steps, right?

And so I have.